Teacher: “Johnny, tell me where elephants are found”
Johnny: Elephants are huge animals, they hardly get lost.
Joe and Micky two drunks were on a visit to Africa.When they hit the bed, mosquitoes, started biting them.Joe said” lets put out the light”, just then a glow-worm entered the room. Joe shouted “Its no use Micky, they have brought lanterns to search us”.
An Indian host had thrown a party to two American drunks and in the course of the lunch,he wanted to test their knowledge about things. Having found they were getting nowhere with his inquiries,he thought of testing their knowledge in literature,and quipped “well gentleman, what can you say about Umar Khayam,” First one replied” well, i have tasted and the drink is sour”. That was the end of it and the party ended there. when they were returning home, the second one said to the First, “well, if you dont know anything just keep quiet, when you are asked, Umar Khayam is not a kind of drink, it is a kind of cheese”
When Mark Twain, was a news paper reporter, a man finding a spider in the folds of the newspaper, wrote to him “I found a spider in the folds of your News-paper, Tell me is it good luck or bad luck. Mark Twain replied :”finding a spider in the paper is neither a good luck, nor bad luck.The spider, was just looking for someone who had not advertised in our paper, so that it could go and web its nest and lead a contented life there”.
(courtesy: Readers digest)